DIARY OF A WIMPY KID: THE LONG HAUL review

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So, just a heads up. This specific review was originally written at a time when I didn’t count on falling behind on reviews, so my solution was to cram them into a single post. However, I hated the way they turned out, so now I’m putting them into their own reviews. In short, this review is going to be crazy short. With that said, let’s carry on.

Cast: Jason Drucker (BUMBLEBEE [2018]), Alicia Silverstone (BOOK CLUB [2018], and upcoming films THE LODGE [2019] and THE PLEASURE OF YOUR PRESENCE [2019]), Tom Everett Scott (THE LAST WORD [2017], LA LA LAND [2016], and upcoming films I HATE KIDS [2019] and THE PLEASURE OF YOUR PRESENCE), Charlie Wright (INGRID GOES WEST [2017]), Owen Asztalos (PATERSON [2016])

Director/Co-Writer: David Bowers (FLUSHED AWAY [2006])
Co-Writer: Jeff Kinney (the other Wimpy Kid movies)
Composer: Ed Shearmur (ELVIS & NIXON [2016], JOHNNY ENGLISH [2003], and CHARLIE’S ANGELS [2000])
Cinematographer: Anthony B. Richmond (LEGALLY BLONDE [2001], THE SANDLOT [1993], and the upcoming AFRICAN MYSTIQUE [2019])
Editor: Troy Takaki (ALMOST CHRISTMAS [2016])

This is my honest opinion of: DIARY OF A WIMPY KID: THE LONG HAUL

 

(SUMMARY)

In this family road-trip comedy based on the kids books, Greg (Jason Drucker) is a kid who just wants to have fun during his summer vacation. But his lame parents decide to take a road-trip to visit their his grandmother for some quality bonding time. Naturally, hi-jinks ensues and the trip is nowhere as smooth as anyone had hoped.

(REVIEW)

It’s awful. Even for a kids film, it’s utterly garbage. I went in hoping to simply be bored with lame jokes, but I wasn’t ready for the sheer amount of immature humor that would await me. There’s all manners of poop, pee, and vomit jokes that left me feeling like I needed a shower worse than the characters did. Already, this movie had me squirming in disgust, and that’s just in addition to all the other problems. Bad jokes that drag out, utterly stupid resolutions to problems with the simplest of answers, a painfully obvious and distractingly Asian brother, a family that doesn’t resemble anything remotely close to their stick-figure drawings, I wouldn’t recommend this movie to a toddler, let alone to any kid who might be interested. Don’t see it. It’s trash. Not even a rental. Spare your kids’ brain cells and show them anything else other than this.

My honest rating for DIARY OF A WIMPY KID: THE LONG HAUL: 1/5

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